cat invasion

[WreckTangle]

Over the last couple of months, my house seems to have become a cat magnet.

NO really, in the morning/evening when I am outside I can always see the everyone cat in the whole street ......floating around my house...., no really, everyone else house is seamlessly cat free ..... but no, my house is now the epicenter of the cat social life in the street.

I have been told that the person that lived in the house before, was a classic 'mad cat lady' who always kept feeding the wretched things, so for some reason I suspect that the cats think that I will do the same.

Unfortunately, I have a 'not liking attitude' against cats, as when I lived with my parents, we had a cat. All it did was scratch the carpet, shit everywhere and would never go out of the house using the cat flap, instead, demanded to be let out to the front door by scratching the door......then when it was let out, it would run around the side of the house, come through the cat flap at the back of the house, run straight to the front door and demand to be let out again...

anyway, rant against cats over, is there any way to make all the cats .......go way... I chase after them, but they keep coming back. It's worse when in the morning I look through the glass at the back door and can see them hanging around, waiting to be let it. If I open the door, the will try to get in through to door, I have to keep stamping my feet, but they won't get the message.

My dad (guy with a sick sense of humour) brought me a cat toy, nailed to a cross and put it in the back garden to act as a warning, but they still don't get the message.

Any ideas?
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My wife asked me to get her something that goes from 0-100 in under 5 seconds for her birthday. ......................I got her a bathroom scale.

[iooi]

Get a dog
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Just because my bike was A DIVVY, does not mean i am......

[Polarbear]

Get a dog.

Edited to add SNAP!
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Triumph Trophy Launch Edition

[WreckTangle]

[Sister Sledge]

Get a fen trap and bait it with a bit of fish. When the deed is done, nail the cat corpse to your fence as a warning to other cats.

On a serious note: Have you recently bought a new house plant? Might be one they like if you have.
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CCM 404 DS

[WreckTangle]

[stinkwheel]

Is there catnip in the garden? Good chance there is if the house was owned by a crazy cat lady.

Anyway. A mate of mine has a PIR activated sprinkler in his garden. They do not like that.
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“Rule one: Always stick around for one more drink. That's when things happen. That's when you find out everything you want to know.”
I did the 2010 Round Britain Rally on my 350 Bullet. 89 landmarks, 3 months, 9,500 miles.

[WreckTangle]

[Easy-X]

Replace all the flowers in the beds with spiky, thorny plants.

Personal self-defence: a squirty water bottle in the face does the trick. (Squirt them in the face with water, don't just twat 'em with the bottle!) Rustling cheap carrier bags does the same for some cats.

Cats have a tendency to like a spot for a time and then get bored and find a new favourite spot. If you don't feed them and keep giving them gyp they should move on.
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Royal Enfield Continental GT 535, Husqvarna Vitpilen 401, Yamaha XSR700, Honda Rebel, Yamaha DT175, Suzuki SV650 (loan) Fazer 600, Keeway Superlight 125, 50cc turd scooter

[Riejufixing]

Pressure washer outside or from the kitchen. Edit: not point blank if permanent harm is to be avoided.

(Edit: SP)

[hellkat]

[WreckTangle]

[Old Git Racing]

Water, they hate it. Chuck some at them or spray them with it, they wont come back. We have 4 cats so not a cat hater like you. Don't hurt them, they are just trying to get on with life like most of us.

OGR
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2022 Tiger Sport 660 2019 Street Twin 2003 K3 gixxer 1000 1998 Srad 600 track hack

[mentalboy]

If you have a zoo nearby go see if they sell tiger shit, if they do, buy a bag and spread it around the garden perimeter, cats hate tigers more than they hate water.
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Make mine a Corona.

[Sister Sledge]

A garden that's a work in progress? By that do you mean a complete mess or do you mean half dug?
Reason I ask is half dug gives cats the ideal natural toilet to crap into. If the garden is a mess then vermin has moved in and it's luring cats in aswell. Winter is here - cold and wet. Vermin will try to avoid those and will seek comfort.

Remember: Animals are simple. They seek food and shelter. Take one thing away and the animals move on. Unless catnip is in that toy..

Just a shame you don't live close to a certain member here who had a neighbourly rat problem.
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CCM 404 DS

[BTTD]

If it wasn't for the previous owner being a mad cat lady I would say that your house is infested with a billion mice.
But she was a mad cat lady so the whole place is probably infused with catnip as others have suggested.
I had a neighbours cat dumping in my flower beds, so bought a PIR sprayer connected to the hose pipe. Worked a treat on the cat and made going to the shed without remembering, quite the adventure. Caught the wife out several times.
A "helpful" friend suggested putting tiger poo in the flower beds as apparently that would keep the cats away and their sister in law worked at Marwell zoo and could get as much as I needed. I didn't see how replacing cat poo with larger tiger poos was going to reduce the smell or the amount of poo in my flower beds so I never tried it, but no one else has suggested it so.....

[MarJay]

Orange peel. Whenever you eat an orange, put the orange peel on the border of the garden. Cats hate citrus, and it's like the opposite of catnip for them.

As discussed, check for catnip plants on your garden. If you find one, remove it.

Don't go spraying them, and don't buy a dog just because you don't like cats in your garden.
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British beauty: Triumph Street Triple R; Loony stroker: KR1S; Track fun: GSXR750 L1; Commuter Missile: GSX-S1000F; Cheap project: CBR900RR FireBlade
Remember kids, bikes aren't like lego. You can't easily take a part from one bike and then fit it to another.

[Polarbear]

[linuxyeti]

[WreckTangle]

[MarJay]

[Diggs]

...or you could embrace the fact, become single, a bit smelly, get a bead curtain for your door and a selection 'dream-catchers' as conversation pieces in the vain hope that somebody will visit.

apologies to cat owners not fitting this stereotypical description...
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Now - Speed Triple, old ratty GS550, GSXR750M
Gone (in order of ownership) - Raleigh Runabout, AP50, KH125, GP125, KH250, CBX550, Z400, CB750FII, 250LC, GS550, ZXR750H1, Guzzi Targa, GSX750F, KH250 x2, Bimota SB6R and counting...

[BTTD]

[The Shaggy D.A.]

https://www.iflscience.com/plants-and-animals/cats-caught-breaking-into-human-body-farm-to-feast-on-the-dead/
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Chances are quite high you are not in my Monkeysphere, and I don't care about you. Don't take it personally.
Currently : Royal Enfield 350 Meteor
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[LustyLew]