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Have you succumbed to growing an apocalypse beard?
Yes, I might be a lazy twat.
59%
 59%  [ 16 ]
No, you dirty bunch.
40%
 40%  [ 11 ]
Total Votes : 27

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mentalboy
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PostPosted: 02:01 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Beards Reply with quote

What is it with beards and impending doom?

I hate having them, they make my skin break out, itch like fury, when I smoked the hair on the upper lip was always a delightful orange colour and permanently stank, if I don't trim it I look like an Iranian muslim cleric and they are such a pain in the butt to trim.

And yet, it would seem, I'm growing another, as it seems is every other normally clean shaven male I know.
It has only just occurred to me that I just can't be arsed to shave when life throws something unexpected or stressful, leaving school (one and only time I went full raghead style), running a business (tidied up but not much else), divorce and emigration (village people style [wtf???]) and now I'm six days in and looking like the average Movember wannabe after they haven't shaved for a month!!

Edit: Not applicable to sailors and those who love their all year round bum fluff.
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chickenstrip
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PostPosted: 02:16 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

Having burned one side of my face off, I'm not overly keen on the half-bearded look Laughing
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Riejufixing
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PostPosted: 02:17 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Re: Beards Reply with quote

mentalboy wrote:
if I don't trim it I look like an Iranian muslim cleric and they are such a pain in the butt to trim

Knee them in the groin first, then they should be much easier to deal with.
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pepperami
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PostPosted: 05:33 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

Me and the missus have little bet on, that I can grow a beard in two weeks? Laughing
I just hope she doesnt try growing a beard Sick

Im praying for the phone to ring, calling me out to work so I can shave this nasty fungus off my face.
The initial itching is already driving me mad Evil or Very Mad

Now Im growing the beard, next I need to fashion some spears, and make some footwear out of animal fur and a loincloth.
Ill be ready for the apocalypse Thumbs Up
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recman
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PostPosted: 08:10 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

pepperami wrote:
The initial itching is already driving me mad Evil or Very Mad


That subsides considerably once you've passed the tramp stage.
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The Shaggy D.A.
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PostPosted: 08:22 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

I never look more homeless than when I'm staying at home.
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pepperami
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PostPosted: 09:04 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh noes! Im gonna have to shave and smarten myself up.

Saved by a call to turn in to work Smile


Pepperami is so sad. Wink
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wr6133
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PostPosted: 09:12 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

Intent is not to shave for the duration. Can't be arsed and also quite fancy a full ZZ top.

That said I usually manage about 3 weeks at which point it itches alot and I shave.
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kgm
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PostPosted: 09:27 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

I've normally got a short beard. The irritation/itching goes away after the first couple of weeks once it's established. Using beard balm/oil makes a difference too. I just run a set of beard clippers over it once a week to keep it today
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JackButler
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PostPosted: 09:31 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

We have a name for men without a beard . . . WIMMIN.

Grey beards rock.
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Nobby the Bastard
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PostPosted: 09:46 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sod the beard. I haven't shaved my knackers for 2 weeks.
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Lord Percy
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PostPosted: 10:07 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

My face has been set to the 2-4mm stubble setting for about 8 years now.

At times like this, I always let it get a bit more scruffy. I've never gone full beard though. Probably will someday.
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Polarbear
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PostPosted: 10:23 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

I've had a goatee for years. It varies from short to bushy to scruffy and back to tidy depending on my mood and wifies orders.
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The Shaggy D.A.
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PostPosted: 11:11 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

I tend to trim mine when it starts to interfere with my food.

Also fucking aggravating when you crack a can open and get your stache caught in the ringpull.
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mentalboy
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PostPosted: 11:33 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Shaggy D.A. wrote:
I tend to trim mine when it starts to interfere with my food.

Also fucking aggravating when you crack a can open and get your stache caught in the ringpull.


There's another reason for using a glass, the first being that, apparently, Mickey mouse and his extended family like to shit on the tops...
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Easy-X
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PostPosted: 11:42 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

Nobby the Bastard wrote:
Sod the beard. I haven't shaved my knackers for 2 weeks.


The only drawback here is once the pubes get to ~3 inches and then start getting trapped in the zip Shocked
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ThunderGuts
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PostPosted: 11:44 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yes, but strictly speaking no as I have owned a facial garden since 2015 (I do mow it occasionally)
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Bhud
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PostPosted: 11:52 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

Letting it grow longer and messier, as befits the gravity of the situation.
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Nobby the Bastard
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PostPosted: 12:07 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

mentalboy wrote:
The Shaggy D.A. wrote:
I tend to trim mine when it starts to interfere with my food.

Also fucking aggravating when you crack a can open and get your stache caught in the ringpull.


There's another reason for using a glass, the first being that, apparently, Mickey mouse and his extended family like to shit on the tops...


They have difficulty doing it inside a box of 18....
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Peanut_Butter
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PostPosted: 13:18 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

I love a good beard. And this was before beards became fashionable.
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WreckTangle
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PostPosted: 13:19 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

not saying that beards are good or bad, but does the weight of a big beard not add weight to your face? Thinking
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Last edited by WreckTangle on 15:16 - 26 Mar 2020; edited 1 time in total
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martin734
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PostPosted: 14:04 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have had a beard for about 20 years. I did shave it of once a couple of years ago but the missus prefers me with a beard as long as it is neat and tidy.
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Clanger
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PostPosted: 14:08 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

No, I haven't tried...
I don't actually think I'd suit a facial beard...and I certainly don't think all men suit their facial beards either.
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JackButler
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PostPosted: 14:12 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

martin734 wrote:
I have had a beard for about 20 years. I did shave it of once a couple of years ago but the missus prefers me with a beard as long as it is neat and tidy.


My missus reckons there's less chance of me having an affair . . . .
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WreckTangle
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PostPosted: 15:20 - 26 Mar 2020    Post subject: Reply with quote

mentalboy wrote:
What is it with beards and impending doom?


this might actually be not far from the truth, as (according) the some sources from the media, beards might help the spread of the modern plague

https://metro.co.uk/2020/02/27/beards-may-make-likely-catch-coronavirus-12311861/

shaving saves lifes Thinking
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