What's with all the getting married threads?

[Itchy]

Seriously Why?

Quite simply why? What possible enhancement of one's relationship does marriage do?

In that I'm not quite Skudd, i.e. anti or Mike or all of my other friends who married and divorced, but some how I can't quite see what difference being legally wedded does for anybody. Other than taking one party to the cleaners if the relationship falls apart.

I mean think of it the wisest person on the Forum Keith has lived in Sin for quite some time!
____________________
Spain 2008France 2007Big one 2009 We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will. In the end, your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it is worth watching.

[Paxovasa]

Even living in sin can end with one party been taken to the cleaners (common law wife).
____________________
Suzuki GSF600 K3 (in the fastest colour, black).

[Tonka]

[GhostRider]

Funny I was thinking the same thing really, the only thing it does is cement in the fact that she gets half your shit when she gets fed up. I think most girls want to do it for the sake of having a nice wedding in itself, not so much the sentiment of being married itself. I can see marriage becoming obsolete in years to come, before it was because if you didn't get married and had sex you'd burn in hell for eternity, then people got wise to that horseshit, but then it was just frowned upon by society (thinking like the 50's/60's here) and was seen as the done thing, but now people could give a fuck less what other people think so that's out the window, so what real incentive is left? I think most blokes couldn't care a less either way - it's just a piece of paper at the end of the day. Once little girls stop getting the idea drilled into their heads about a fairy tale wedding from the moment they are spawned then it will start to nip it in the bud and before long it'll just be a thing you do if you want but probably without all the ceremony involved, which means couples can spend their money on something useful instead like a mortgage, car, holiday, their current or prospective kids instead of paying out 10's of thousands of pounds to invite relatives you haven't seen in 10 years to come and stuff their faces at your expensive buffet and own extortionately priced dresses that will never again see the light of day again.

GhostRider
____________________
I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why. My nightly bloodlust has overflown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy. I think my mask of sanity is about to slip.

[Fawbish]

What the actual arguement will usually fall down to would be - do you want to make your girlfriend happy. "Yes, because I love her." Despite your attempts at deconstructing the social engineering she has undoubtedly undergone (and no, I am not just being chauvanistic, it's very, very likely that despite the lack of logic, even those most cold hearted of bitches would dream for a wedding to end all others) she will want romance, and wedding bells. "Okay...I suppose if it's gonna make her happy..."

WHAM. Done. The weight of society wins again.

I'm not fussed either way - it would make people happy, if the circumstances were right, the only negative is the undoubtedly extortionate cost of the whole event. And complications if things go tits up further down the line.
____________________
"Oh....it looks like Average Joe's is forfeiting the match!" - "Yeah, its a risky strategy but lets see if it pays off for 'em Cotton."

[pa_broon74]

Marriage is a bit like having kids I reckon.

Its deeply unfashionable before the act but once you're in the midst of it, it seems to be the only way to exist and people (seem anyway) to wonder why didn't they do it sooner.

Meanwhile all the hardnosed single types are irritated at the smug self-absorbed happiness the married's seem to have going on and continually pissed off at being bombarded with digital pictures and stories of toilet/food based derring-do by extremely small babies.

The other thing of course is when all your peers start veering off to get married then produce the inevitable off-shoots, it just serves to remind you of your own mortality and sense of time running out and general inability and inadequacies when it comes to commitment and being grown up.

I think it works for some but not others, I count myself as one of the latter for what that information is worth. Also, I'm not really very keen on people and my Victorian upbringing means I am an emotional cripple.


____________________
Didn't catch anything.

[Tonka]

Well, in the true spirit of a balanced BCF debate have another view!!

You could argue that for some men the old fashioned view of marriage is a form of ownership. How many women wear wedding rings compared with men? How many women change their surnames and in effect lose the identity they've had for the previous chapters in their lives? I rebelled against all this and hated the feeling of being 'owned' and it ensured my marriage failed, as my ex didn't have the emotional capacity to deal with it (not a failing on his part I might add). He was as institutionalised as these fluffy girls you speak of!

Things have changed massively in the past few years - many more men wear rings, aren't too bothered about name changes, want to have children, settle down and pull their weight with chores and financial contributions to make a partnership and marriage work.

Lots of folk have small low cost church weddings or understated registry office weddings - it's because of that you don't hear about them!! The whole wedding furore is often caused as much by relatives as by the couple themselves - you have to be a very strong and determined character to have the wedding of your (and that includes the Groom) dreams and not everyone elses. For the record mine was a small, low cost church one - £2k all in for the reception, clothes, flowers, cake, photos, rings and 100 people attended. It can be done and many people do it!

.............carry on!!
____________________
'The core of a man's spirit comes from new experiences'
Suzuki SV650S (Clean); Yamaha XT250 Serow (Dirty)

[Silver]

[dodsi]

Why? because you whipped.

[pa_broon74]

[Tonka]

[Itchy]

[Phoenix]

If you've been together for 15 years and it's still going swimmingly then I can't see an issue with getting married as it's unlikely things will turn sour. Most people get married after only a few years though, seems it's more of a way to prove the relationship rather than just a natural progression which is why it probably fails so often. I am not against getting married but i'd need to be with the person for a long, long time first, there's always a pre-nup

[Tonka]

[Skudd]

[neatbik]

I got a nice holiday out of it.

[Silver]

[Dazbo666]

[ms51ves3]

[J0Al1]

[jdm]

Absolutely no intentions of going down that route in future!

Was engaged once and cost me fortune, never got £1250 engagement ring back, lost half house, all furniture and now pay maintenance for pleasure of seeing child, and i left with suitcase and 2 bags of clothes as couldn't see her without as my daughter was living there, but sh!t when engagement failure costs that i hate to think marriage breakdown would cost!!
____________________
Good women make me happy, bad one's even happier!
Current Bike = '97 YZF600R Thundercat

[neatbik]

[GhostRider]

[Mord]

I got married only because my partner needed a visa. She is not from the EU.

If not that I would have been single still. Normally I see no point in getting married.

[pa_broon74]