Help & FAQs    Search BCF    Members    Groups    Events Calendar
Resend my activation email : Register : Log in 
BCF: Bike Chat Forums


Don't get your grandpa laid

 Reply to topic
Bike Chat Forums Index -> Random Banter
View previous topic : View next topic  
Author Message

oldpink
World Chat Champion



Joined: 02 Aug 2006
Karma :
PostPosted: 16:19 - 20 Dec 2013    Post subject: Don't get your grandpa laid Reply with quote
it may be bad for his life expectancy

Quote:
A grandfather who won a tryst with two hookers choked to death before he could enjoy his threesome.

Johnny Orris, 86, from Illinois, was entered into a contest by radio shock jock Howard Stern, called “I Want to Get My Grandpa Laid,” by his grandson, Ed Moody.

He told the show he had not had sex since his wife died more than a decade ago, and was awarded the encounter at the legal Moonlite Bunny Ranch brothel in Nevada.

Orris went to the ranch and chose two girls, then headed to a steakhouse in Lake Tahoe, where he died.

His grieving grandson, who was with him, told Radar Online: “He had not been with a woman for 11 years since my grandmother died.

“He had two girls planned out, Caressa Kisses and Vanity – Caressa is all that he talked about. He was going to spend the night with them but he never got back to the Bunny Ranch.

“I think he was eating too fast because he wanted to get there quickly, but sadly he did not make it.

“I was with him. He was choking to death. Hr was eating prime rib and he started choking.”

Moody and the maitre d'hotel tried the Heimlich manouevre and CPR, but after an ambulance took him to hospital he was prounouced dead.

Moody went on: “He was having the greatest day of his life, and it went to hell. He was feeling great. He was being treated like a rock star.”

But his grandad's winnings did not go completely to waste.

Bunny Ranch owner Dennis Hof let him have a free roll in the hay with one of his girls – though not Caressa Kisses or Vanity.

Hof said the two girls who appeared on Stern's show and named Orris the winner, Caressa and Rain Riches “are distraught and are going to need some sort of counselling.”

____________________
I have become comfortably numb

Theory & hazard 24-may 2016, CBT 8th June 2016, MOD 1 2nd Aug 2016 Mod 2 2nd-Nov 2016 - Current bike CBR 600 RR
 Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website You must be logged in to rate posts

James83
Crazy Courier



Joined: 10 Apr 2013
Karma :
PostPosted: 17:00 - 20 Dec 2013    Post subject: Reply with quote
I'm sorry, he was not only going to get laid for the first time in a decade, but with 2 women at once, and he decided that could wait until he got a steak? Was he a stupid?

Edit - Also, if one of the largest DJs in the states is footing the bill, why was he at such a crappy whore house that they couldn't bring him a steak while he was there?
 Back to top
View user's profile Send private message You must be logged in to rate posts

Rogerborg
nimbA



Joined: 26 Oct 2010
Karma :
PostPosted: 17:12 - 20 Dec 2013    Post subject: Reply with quote
Because ordering "Whorehouse Beefsteak" off the menu might get you something more like:

https://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Film/Pix/pictures/2009/3/20/1237563027228/Jon-Voigt-in-Midnight-Cow-001.jpg
____________________
Biking is 1/20th as dangerous as horse riding.
GONE: HN125-8, LF-250B, GPz 305, GPZ 500S, Burgman 400 // RIDING: F650GS (800 twin), Royal Enfield Bullet Electra 500 AVL, Ninja 250R because racebike
 Back to top
View user's profile Send private message You must be logged in to rate posts

Ariel Badger
Super Spammer



Joined: 02 Dec 2006
Karma :
PostPosted: 18:12 - 20 Dec 2013    Post subject: Reply with quote
I do not mind the risk, send me whores.
____________________
Bikers make great organ donors, get 115 on your licence today.
 Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail You must be logged in to rate posts
Old Thread Alert!

The last post was made 12 years, 202 days ago. Instead of replying here, would creating a new thread be more useful?
  Display posts from previous:   
This page may contain affiliate links, which means we may earn a small commission if a visitor clicks through and makes a purchase. By clicking on an affiliate link, you accept that third-party cookies will be set.

Post new topic   Reply to topic    Bike Chat Forums Index -> Random Banter All times are GMT + 1 Hour
Page 1 of 1

 
 You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You cannot download files in this forum

Read the Terms of Use! - Powered by phpBB © phpBB Group
 
Debug Mode: ON - Server: birks (www) - Page Generation Time: 0.08 Sec - Server Load: 5.1 - MySQL Queries: 14 - Page Size: 41.59 Kb