bullied at work...:-(

[Top Cat]

Hi All,

needs some advice, I have just been off work for 2 weeks with laryngitis, its my 3rd sickness in a year all 3 sicknesses have sick note so all genuine, i accepts the rules are there but my manager is on my back about how much i do in my spare time and will use it against me in the hearing,

I play squash once or twice a week, rock climbing every other week and climb mountains, long walks, mountain biking in the summer.

she is trying to say i do too much and this is bringing my immune system down therefore my fault I'm I'll? she has also mentioned that riding by bike to work will also make me more likely to be ill,

surely my private life has nothing to do with work, but she is giving me a hard time over this, not sure if i should take it further or not, this will look bad on my record, and don't want to make myself a target

any advice appreciated

thanks

Tracy

[bazza]

Looks like a pretty active lifestyle to me. Ask your manager about her qualifications in remote diagnosis and immunology.
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[rotax81]

i thought doing activities made you fitter




as for riding to work making you ill...............wtf!!!
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[Paivi]

What the catfish said. Your lifestyle sounds perfect, just what the doctors are recommending.

Sometimes people just get sick, she should get over it. If you have sick notes for all your illnesses, she doesn't have a leg to stand on in any hearing. Often, once you've been ill, it's easier to catch something else afterwards, as your immune system is weakened, which is why you sometimes go from one illness to another. I've gone years without anything, then I get an eye infection, followed by bronchitis, followed by pneumonia, followed by an infected insect bite. What a great year that was.

Also, you would have picked up these bacteria or viruses somewhere, most probably at work. Maybe one of your colleagues/bosses has come to work ill or too soon after an illness, so you've caught it and it's affected you more than others.

How you commute to work is your business; if anything, not squeezing yourself into a germ filled commuter train/tube/bus, you're making it less likely for you to get ill.
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My other bike's a Monster...

[Top Cat]

thanks all,

A work mate of mine broke both his arms mountain biking and she tried to take his sick pay off hin,as it was his fault for doing a dangerous sport,

I'm worried this is where she's going with me, If i put in a complaint someone else will do the diciplinary but then i will make an enemy, she is my team manager and sits in the desk next to mine

would you complain now or see what happens in the hearing? will be taking a witness in with me.

Tracy

[Grendel]

I have a similar problem at work were a superior member of staff is making up lies against me saying how bad I was and how I let the whole team down. Only problem being I’ve only just gone back to work after 2 months off following a bike accident in June so where she got all these supposed recent faults of mine from I have no idea. But manager and superior staff tend to close ranks so looks like I may get royally screwed just because one of my team members was having a bad day and wanted to take it out on a junior member of staff.
Now my predicament is the same as yours do I turn it around and claim staff bullying and make an enemy in a small close nit team or do I just apologies and eat humble pie for something I didn’t do to in the first place.
I'm not looking forward to returning to work Monday so i can sympathise with your situation
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[JonT]

In this situation you have to make an enemy or you are going to get pushed about forever.

Firstly, document everything, times places what was said.

Next do not allow her to even make comments about your private life to you 1 to 1. If she tries to say something stop her and ask her to schedule a meeting with you, her, and her superior to discuss the issues she has with your private life.

Chances are when you say that she will STFU since if she walked into a meeting and said that crazy crap she would look like a fool.

Jon.

[Thesupersport...]

All i can say Topcat is that your boss sounds like the biggest C@NT ever!!!!

[growler]

I agree with Jonnyt document EVERYTHING and don't let her get you alone
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DILLIGAF

[nasty]

Keep your cool, as others have said write everything down and KEEP IT SAFE!
Your personal life is your business, not theirs! I know some employers can try and say that your personal life is having an effect on your ability to do your job but that's normally saved for things like if you have alchohol or relationship issues not legitimate leisure activities.
Are you a meber of a Union? If so get in touch with your Union rep to see what can be done but no doubt whatever happens you'll make an enemy of your boss and that is the best way rather than let her push you around.
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ZX6R F3

[GhostRider]

My missus' mom had a problem with a member of staff at work, no need to go into detail but he was being extremely abusive verbally and making extremely lewd suggestions, she told her supervisor but since it was always him an her whenever he went on about this shit there wasnt much solid evidence. A £25 dictaphone with a 10 hour recording time in her pocket throughout her shift ensured that he was swiftly suspended and as far as he is concerned he is fired. Which is just as well really, since I had a word with a few pals and we were going to pay him a little visit at his house some random day at 3 in the morning.

Still, that aside, in line with whats been said about documenting everything, a dictaphone is a cheap and efficient way of having solid evidence about anything thats said, be in it the open office or if she catches you one on one. Besides, with all this crap she is coming out with she'll never convince anyone at any hearing that you should assume responsibility, my guess is that she is trying to scare you,a kind of psychological attack, such that you are already assuming you are guilty, and thus will spend any hearing sounding as if you are trying to talk yourself out of it, when in fact you've done nothing wrong at all. A confident attitude will ensure that she will probably be pulled to one side afterwards to be questioned on what shit she is trying to pull and why is she wasting everybodys time.

GhostRider
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[yen_powell]

[bladerunner]

Me I'd just put the bitch in traction.But then agan I never was the subtle type

Her bullying attitude is more likely to have people off with stress costing more than she will save the company with this stupidity.

Fair enough if someone is taking the mick out of the company..Kiss them good bye but this woman is not helping the staff feel like they should bother doing more than the basics after all they will just get screwed over at the earliest opertunity.
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Current bikes...cbr929, KDX200's, Rd125lc mk2, RGV250's

[Kwaks]

You had a back to work interview? I take it this is where all this was said.

Now she is talking a disciplinary hearing, so you need 24 hrs notice and its your choice of witness.

I would go on the attack in the interview, question the need for it, the qualifications of the person who deemed it necessary against those of your GP etc etc. Keep calm at all times but fill the time by asking them questions and put them on the spot.

A union rep would be good, but don't be afraid to ask for a break/suspension to seek further advice if necessary.
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[Kal]

[Clanger]

This sounds like jealousy talking...

Sounds like it's time to keep your talks down to purely work topics and the weather only. Keep it that way, and they won't have anything to pick on you about.
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter won't mind - Dr. Seuss

[Tonka]

[Dragonfly]

I would join a union. I was bullied at work and it got so bad they set me up for firing me. Started off just a few jibes at me then got worse and worse into warnings for silly things until I was sacked. The union I joined slaughterd them and I won my unfair dismissal case. I was there for 4 years of torture and it took them that long as they couldt find a thing on me! couldnt even give a proper reason why they sacked me.

I hate bosses like that, they think they have the right to say anything to anyone as they have power over your job. And the problem is they do and mask it up with any crap they find in the work manuel.

[Flip]

Nothing worse than a bullying boss... I'll send you a PM. Things I don't want on here.

[chris-red]

I love it when people try that with me.


I had one moan because I took 2 days off after a bike crash, I gently reminded him that he took a week off when his Son was ill, and that would never happen to me. I also added that I have never been late or couldn't get in because the trains where knackered or there was heavy traffic because of my mode of transport.

Defently question her medical background if she says anything about your health. Also make a point of saying (If it's true) that you are a more reliable member of staff as you are more in control of your journey.
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Skudd:- Perhaps she just thinks you are a window licker and is being nice just in case she becomes another Jill Dando.
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[pits]

Toughen up, take a poo in her desk draw

[SoND]

[Fawbish]

[Clanger]

I didn't say anything about being quiet...I just said keep the personal stuff, well - personal. Don't treat them like they are your friends. They clearly aren't.

I've experienced workplace bullying myself, and it's mainly down to jealousy.

I'd sit and talk crap with the rest of them, the weather, what's on tv, office politics, about who's dating who - etc. but when it came to me, they got nothing.

And when it came to office socials, I would shrug my shoulders and say, nah I'm busy that night...

It works a treat. You may work with these people, but they don't have to be your friends.
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter won't mind - Dr. Seuss

[Fawbish]