Interviews... Selection for dishonest candidates?

[Visitor Q]

Just a quick one. Anyone fancy defending the practice of interviewing, where the overwhelming feeling is that the candidate should avoid being honest no matter what.

Honest answers like 'I was desperate for a job and needed the money' are frowned upon, yet some cock and bull like... In fact fuck, I can't even think of the preferred answer to doing some shite saturday work.

It just seems so incredibly bizarre that in the interview you lie continously, just to get the job, so the employer has absolutely no idea what you're /really/ like.

Apparently stating that I work well in teams, but prefer to do my own work is heinous. Team work is something to be relished, no matter the fucktards 'helping' you.

Bah.

*Hates job searching*
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From September 2014 to January/February 2015 I will not be using any English, nor reading any. As such, I won't be on here. PM at will, but I won't be checking/posting unless in emergencies. Certainly not for the first couple of months. Please berate me savagely if I break that rule...

[Fawbish]

If you wanna get your foot in the doorway Bonny, it cant be covered in shit.



Once they've let you in, doesnt matter much if you dont quite smell all rosy. Just make 'em money and show 'em you can kick the shit out of any job they give you.



Everyone lies. It matters not that it shouldnt be this way, the simple, pure and irrefutable fact is that it is. And yeah, it sucks.

But turn it to your advantage mate. No good having high morals/principles if you wanna make money. No good having ANY if you wanna make serious dosh.

Course theres inbetweens and grey areas. But unfortunately, unless you wanna become a menace to society ( ) you gotta roll with the sheep
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"Oh....it looks like Average Joe's is forfeiting the match!" - "Yeah, its a risky strategy but lets see if it pays off for 'em Cotton."

[Visitor Q]

Aye. I know its the way it is. Which is annoying as when I'm covering big porkies I end up rambling. Joy.

But, is there anyone here who can defend this nonsense?
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China traffic/travel bike vid - When I make a sweeping statement, please add the word 'statistically' in to the sentence before you bitch...
From September 2014 to January/February 2015 I will not be using any English, nor reading any. As such, I won't be on here. PM at will, but I won't be checking/posting unless in emergencies. Certainly not for the first couple of months. Please berate me savagely if I break that rule...

[G]

I have put down such stuff as "various contracting/temporary work to for some extra poecket money" or similar and haven't had a problem with it as that. Remember you don't have to go into the details of every little job you've done - I'd only add them to a CV if they add a positive for the job you were in "gained insight into communicating with a broad selection of society" for a retail job for instance or you need to fill a hole.

Presuming you're talking about previous jobs - obviously if you say this about a job you are currently applying for they're quite reasonably going to go for the person that says they want to keep the job for ten years .

Luckily on CVs and in interview's I've been able to be pretty honest, though it has seemed that often luck is a big part of it.
Being in the right place at the right time when there's a good interviewer that can work out the other people don't know what they're talking about.


I was discussing this whole area with Dusty recently; the problem is partly that it falls to human nature; there will always be someone willing to at least 'embelish' their history: at face value the interviewer is obviosuly going to choose the one that offers the best story.
Unless you get everyone to be absolutley honest, then you're going to have to be a bit 'creative'.

In the end, they've just got what you say to go by, so if you're applying for a job that involves a fair bit of team work, then don't be surpised if they go for the person that says they love working in teams over you that say you don't.

I'd make a point of never claiming anything that you can't legitimately do or have done for a start; it seems this is a bit of a problem with a lot of asian/african contractors; who are perhaps encouraged by recruitment consultans to put everything they might have touched, or even seen a website about once down as a 'skill'.

It took me ages to get an IT job - I'd tried in Essex for a while, then really tried in Reading and still nothing. Went for a retail job for 9 months or so until I got really annoyed with it, though in the mean time got made up to a supervisor and worked as the store manager in his abcense for a while. Getting really annoyed by it I was in the right place at the right time to get a decent job in IT, which I managed.
If you can't find anything else, there are almost always jobs in Retail available; it was a coffee shop for me, which seems to offer a good opportunity for promotion due to their relatively small size. You will however have to be very economical with the truth and make it clear you're looking to go into retail and move up through that (but not too fast) if going for this sort of job.

[stinkwheel]

My Dad used to get the managers to do the interviews but they'd get the candidates to turn up about 20 minutes early.

My Dad would be sat outside reception in an oily boilersuit "waiting to get some paperwork filled in." and have a news with them.

They didn't realise that by the time they went in for the interview, they'd already had it.
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[The Shaggy D.A.]

I've just come from an interview today, and I didn't lie once. I figure I've been in the game long enough; if a company can't handle who I am then I don't want to work there - I've had my share of pretending to be something I'm not just to fit the corporate mold.
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[Visitor Q]

[G]

There was quite a few areas in the current job that I didn't really have knowledge in. I made a point of saying that I'm someone that enjoys to learn and is always trying to do so - something that is true and a reason it's turned out I'm quite valued in my current job too; if something needs doing I'll research the best ways of doing then actually do it, rather than giving up or getting someone else to do it for me.
So, from that, for the bits I don't have knowledge about I've said "I don't know, but I would find out about this". Worked in this case, but they do seem to be a generally decent company that has at least one foot in reality. I suspect at some point in the past they've suffered people who have bullshitted them and have learnt from it - sadly some people don't seem so good at learning from such things (judging by some of the people we've had on our helpdesk!)

[Robby]

I've done a fair few civil service interviews, on both sides of the table.

All of the interviewing is competency example based - we're looking for this skill, give us an example of where you have performed it. The interview is following your application form where you already answered these competency questions, so you can either go into more detail on those examples, or explain some new ones.

You can spot a liar straight off. They can't give background detail, or they'll nose into that same competency for a different questions and fluff the background.

The thing that works best is if someone can genuinely explain several different instances of showing the skills required, has a real interest in the subject matter, and can explain how those skills may be applicable in this job.

So make sure you know and understand the job description and what the company is about before you enter the room. Show them that you want the job and you can do it, and be aware that they can probably spot a bullshitter. Some embellishment is fine though.

[Harold_Shand]

"The perfect interview" - Max Ernst

Good, very good book on handling the whole process. When I was doing interviews, I was ready for anything they could throw at me. You have to engineer it, make it work for you... and when they ask if you have any questions, put the cunts on the spot, let them know how it feels. Didn't get me a job, though

The work I do now is all based on practical skills, they couldn't give a fuck about all the bullshit, it's brilliant. Like you bonny, I was in an environment where it was pure bullshit... I hated it. Maybe you should think about manual work. It's what all the decent people do, there is more common sense, more honesty and more fun.
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BCF's 6th favourite poster 2009-2010

Harold_Shand's theory might be the best explanation.

[Fawbish]

There's nowt wrong with a career change like, but if he went down the manual route now, he would kinda negate 4 years of uni and a lot of debt, and render 9the study at least) kinda pointless.

Though, if his sector is already heavily saturated, and it gets to the point its fucking with your head, a fresh change, a new start might help with that Bonny. You're certainly not a stupid fuck, and picking up new skills will probably be easy for you. Anyways, for the first few years, what you learned at uni probably wont even come into it. Later on maybe, but not when youre starting to climb the ladder, so to speak.

As Harold suggested, starting to think about at least, what markets will be valuable in the near future, and steering your way towards good fortune might have to become a possibility, if following what you want to do doesnt work out.
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"Oh....it looks like Average Joe's is forfeiting the match!" - "Yeah, its a risky strategy but lets see if it pays off for 'em Cotton."

[WildGoose]

He wouldn't be the first to have a have decent degree and do nothing with it, I fail to see where the major worry comes in. I would like to think Bonny would be the first to say university is about the lifestyle/experience as much as any paper you bring out of it with you.

[Visitor Q]

[Harold_Shand]

[Visitor Q]

[Fawbish]

It's all well and good being fucked off with having to be around Sun readers and Mail believers all day long, but just as it is with everything...are you man enough to just deal with it?

It's hard being pretty intellectual and hanging around with nonces all day, and by no means am I saying you have to conform for an easy life, cos that's bullshit.

It's just as much a test of us as a person to have to work with people that don't stimulate us, and would be the same, if not better as the paint on the wall.

If you can deal with the stress of monotony, then write a book, because I'll bet, no matter how many people say they can handle it no problems (still talking about those "intellectual" types that require a higher stimulus) monotony is the thinking mans greatest enemy.

And it fucking sucks.

Sooner or later, everything becomes a fucking monotonous drivel of shit.
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"Oh....it looks like Average Joe's is forfeiting the match!" - "Yeah, its a risky strategy but lets see if it pays off for 'em Cotton."

[Visitor Q]

[Fawbish]

Sometimes I envy them, and sometimes I feel sorry for them.


And it sounds really high and mighty, and I hate being elitist, I really do, because I'm a genuinely nice person.

But when someone talks to you, and they know fuck all about anything, theyre vindictive, they speak like shit, they bullshit around the clock and they think they're better than you because I swear, some people must think I'm a fucking retard if they think I actually believe half of what they say.

I know Im intellectually superior than a lot of people, in and out of my workplace. And that isnt me being a knob, thats fucking fact.

Hell, I know there are tons of people who are massively more intellectual/intelligent than I am.

But sometimes, I do regret having the intelligence to percieve what others seem not to. Or if they do, they don't word it, or speak of it.

I'm not the only one that feels like this, I hope. Otherwise I'm about to branded teh supah elitEST cuntswab.
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"Oh....it looks like Average Joe's is forfeiting the match!" - "Yeah, its a risky strategy but lets see if it pays off for 'em Cotton."

[Harold_Shand]

I love working with retards. One feller stuck some tissue up his nose to stop it running. Then he lit a rollie and set his face on fire...

The same bloke thought he was clever by tying his ear-plugs around his neck. Nearly lost his head when the daft twat got caught in a BIG grass cutter that he dropped down a hill.
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BCF's 6th favourite poster 2009-2010

Harold_Shand's theory might be the best explanation.

[WildGoose]

Your lot don't have access to chainsaws do they?

That might be the day to call in sick.
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So in other words, he stopped you for being flagrantly in posession of a motorcycle in direct contravention of the Hippies, Darkies and People Whose Face I Don't Like The Look of (Police Powers) Act. 1976

[Visitor Q]

Lol, that is always funny.

But ya see, in a room for of bright people I tend to watch my language abit, curb my enthusiasm and chat shop well.

Put me in a room of idiots and out come the head butting competitions

Hence the two worlds comment. I seek out the retards, for a giggle now and again (all my drinking buddies at uni for a start). But to work? Forced to see them day to day to day to... no thanks.

Pop your head in, talk about ass to mouth or the tits on Gemma Atkinson and then leave.

In stevenage though I only have one guy down the local I enjoy seeing. He's 50 odd, recently seperated, intelligent enough to have an opinion and also to say he doesn't know (something I like in a person), yet will drink himself silly and get in head butting competitions until 5 in the mornign with me Juxtaposition is tops

Like I say, it isn't all about acting like you have a silver spoon up your arse and only talking about particle physics. It's just sometimes one needs to.

Never forget in Kos, I'd had 3 weeks of dealing with absolute morons (and as a job having to talk idiot to punters to get them in) and it was turning me retarded. Then I found a brummie guy who was a good laugh, and then we dropped into a conversation about digital physics and such... So absolutely refreshing you wouldn't know.
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China traffic/travel bike vid - When I make a sweeping statement, please add the word 'statistically' in to the sentence before you bitch...
From September 2014 to January/February 2015 I will not be using any English, nor reading any. As such, I won't be on here. PM at will, but I won't be checking/posting unless in emergencies. Certainly not for the first couple of months. Please berate me savagely if I break that rule...