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My ride home

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tutton
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PostPosted: 18:55 - 05 Jan 2009    Post subject: My ride home Reply with quote

Today I was riding home after popping some wheelies in Maccers carpark to impress the girls. Anyway, so there I was, head on the tank, engine screaming beneath me like that girl on Friday night.

I came over the crest of this hill, letting the front rise up off the top, holding the wheelie just below the balance point so I could keep the throttle pinned and wave to the school children now gathered round the school gates watching me.

Suddenly, fingers to fear gripped tightly around my beating heart as I saw...a ice cream van that I was just flying past, DAMN! I said to myself in my helmet, I must remember to go back there later.

Anyway, there I was holding this wheelie waving away at the cheering school children on the path throwing a couple of combos into the wheelie to mix it up a little, then I saw it.

It's bright contrasting colours had me in a daze. It was a speed camera van!!! Not sure how many light years fast I was going as I was concentrating whats for dinner tonight, but I knew I was breaking the speed limit as I was wearing out my air maxs on the roundabouts I was going so fast.

So I slammed on the rear brake to bring the, now stopped spinning, front wheel down and back into contact with the black ice that I was riding over. I then moved forward so that I was sat on the tank, spread my legs and got comfortable as I started my rolling stoppie. I just kept the stoppie going, nothing fancy, while I began to shed my tremendous speed.

Looking around, I spotted a garage on the side of the road so steered the stoppie in there and did a couple of laps of the pumps untill I was going slow enough to come to a stop next to the kitten, which I reached down a gave a quick stroke, it was a very nice pussy. In my panic I could only think of one person to call, Matthie.

He answered in a tone as if he knew there was a problem he needed to solve. I quickly gave a run down of my situation, missing out the wheelies ect as he condones illegal activities. His quick thinking was brilliant, he gave me the idea to cover my plate from the copper who was waiting just down the road to get it. I then placed my hoody over my 'BA0 M4N' plate (see picture below for reference) and rode past the waiting copper in a rolling burnout with the back fish tailing. I then had a rather uneventfull ride home. Thanks for saving me from the scary coppers Matthie!

https://i123.photobucket.com/albums/o297/Gfxs/DSC00314.jpg
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kiers
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PostPosted: 19:13 - 05 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

apparently lukes stolen tuttons account
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chillpill
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PostPosted: 16:55 - 06 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing its all about krispy kreams car parks , thats where all the good skanks are Wink
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CRF_Rider
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PostPosted: 17:40 - 06 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

sounds like the biggest load of crap to me.
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chillpill
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PostPosted: 18:11 - 06 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

yzf_pyerat wrote:
sounds like the biggest load of crap to me.


no shit sherlock
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The Artist
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PostPosted: 18:20 - 06 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
apparently lukes stolen tuttons account



Exactly what I was thinking!!

or we have a new Luke..
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tutton
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PostPosted: 18:29 - 06 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

This story is not entirely 100% the truth.
it did all happen, the picture proves it, now if minidinh reports me im going to skin his cat.
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Skudd
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PostPosted: 21:39 - 06 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
engine screaming beneath me like that girl on Friday night.


Thats the bit I don't believe, unless I see evidence on Crime Watch next week with some 12 year old girl in tears.
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lllN30lll
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PostPosted: 21:43 - 06 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

I nearly believed you, until I read the part that you were doing wheelies Laughing
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PeterNSR
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PostPosted: 21:58 - 06 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

lllN30lll wrote:
I nearly believed you, until I read the part that you were doing wheelies Laughing


+1 Thumbs Up
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Chriss
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PostPosted: 22:27 - 06 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ace Biker tells 'em better.
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MattHirst
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PostPosted: 22:38 - 06 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

Skudd wrote:
Quote:
engine screaming beneath me like that girl on Friday night.


Thats the bit I don't believe, unless I see evidence on Crime Watch next week with some 12 year old girl in tears.


Only poon tutton has seen is when he changes his mothers nappy Thumbs Up
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tutton
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PostPosted: 22:58 - 06 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chriss wrote:
Ace Biker tells 'em better.

hes gone to ground the miserable cnut.

Quote:
Only poon tutton has seen is when he changes his mothers nappy

What the fuck, unlike you i dont make habbits of incest activities with my parents like you eh?
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craigs23
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PostPosted: 23:27 - 06 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

Some say I taught Rossi the best way around Donnington Park.

Some say I taught the Stig how to get his kit whiter than white.

All you know is, I've got a photo of my bike with a masked numberplate.

https://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y51/whers84/ahha.jpg
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MattHirst
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PostPosted: 00:10 - 08 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

tutton wrote:

What the fuck, unlike you i dont make habbits of incest activities with my parents like you eh?


Incest, a game the whole family can play!

Very Happy
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Xenocide
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PostPosted: 19:18 - 08 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

I can't believe I just wasted a minute of my life reading that!
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lurker
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PostPosted: 02:16 - 10 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

been a while.
has jackanory been at it again.
(i might have to troll through his posts to read his "new" ripping yarn).
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Ichy
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PostPosted: 02:35 - 10 Jan 2009    Post subject: Re: My ride home Reply with quote

tutton wrote:
and wave to the school children now gathered round the school gates watching me.


Never know you might get lucky, those infants are hot ain't they!


Pull a combo! Whats that? Piss and shit yourself at the same time?
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Marcg868
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PostPosted: 03:29 - 10 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

MattHirst wrote:
tutton wrote:

What the fuck, unlike you i dont make habbits of incest activities with my parents like you eh?


Incest, a game the whole family can play!

Very Happy


Especially in Blackburn or Wigan.
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TUG
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PostPosted: 06:32 - 10 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

bwfc4eva86 wrote:


Especially in Blackburn or Wigan.

no its only incest if its my family i shagged, not yours... Thumbs Up Rolling Eyes
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Marcg868
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PostPosted: 07:12 - 10 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

XlonewolfX wrote:
bwfc4eva86 wrote:


Especially in Blackburn or Wigan.

no its only incest if its my family i shagged, not yours... Thumbs Up Rolling Eyes


I know what incest means. The comment above means.

Incest and Interbreeding is rife among families in Blackburn and Wigan. Hence the comment Rolling Eyes
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Matthie
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PostPosted: 12:36 - 10 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tutton, watch out for dem darkies, watch out.

Laughing

I hope you remembered your donor card before you went out today, the one that says 'Get yer thievin mits aff me organs, get ya own.'
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tutton
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PostPosted: 15:40 - 10 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

Matthie wrote:
Tutton, watch out for dem darkies, watch out.

Laughing

I hope you remembered your donor card before you went out today, the one that says 'Get yer thievin mits aff me organs, get ya own.'


he wasnt impressed by me being racist Laughing
and i wrote on my helmet im a cunt dont take my body organs.
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TUG
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PostPosted: 16:46 - 10 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

bwfc4eva86 wrote:
XlonewolfX wrote:

no its only incest if its my family i shagged, not yours... Thumbs Up Rolling Eyes


I know what incest means. The comment above means.

Incest and Interbreeding is rife among families in Blackburn and Wigan. Hence the comment Rolling Eyes

blackburn maybe but bolton is worse for it. Thumbs Up
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Marcg868
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PostPosted: 02:27 - 11 Jan 2009    Post subject: Reply with quote

[/quote]
blackburn maybe but bolton is worse for it. Thumbs Up[/quote]

Thankfully im not born in Bolton, just unfortunate enough to live here.

Haha nah i dont mind Wigan, just dont like the football team.
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