Your most humiliating on-bike experience......

[mistergixer]

Picture the scene - it's 6am on a sunny Saturday morning, the roads are more or less deserted, you and a mate have just swapped bikes for a bit of a test and pointed them down a stretch of dual carriageway. Beneath you is a black K5 GSXR1000, a machine of much awesomeness.

Hunched below the screen, engine howling, the speedo counting rapidly upwards in custodial sentence figures: 175, 176, 177......

You catch site of movement in your peripheral vision, and glance sideways. Its your mate, wringing the neck of your slower (K5 750) bike. Only, he's not 'wringing it's neck', he's not in a racing crouch trying to tuck everything behind the screen, he doesn't have the clocks hitting his chin with every bump.

No, he's sat pretty much bolt upright, his body twisted round to his right, almost riding side-saddle. What's he doing now? He's riding one-handed, and with his left hand he's giving you the Avid Merrion MJ 'Chamone' sign*.

This was (at the time) the fastest you've ever gone, on the most powerful bike you've ever ridden. And your mate is laughing at you. Laughing at you as he goes past one handed, chamone-ing, on a slower bike.

Humiliation = complete

Please note - only 'on-bike' experiences count in this thread, otherwise i'd be posting about the time i filled up at a French petrol station, knocked my lid off the mirror, and in my haste to stop it from bouncing across the forecourt managed to trip over my own feet and go sprawling face-first across the concrete. Mind you, i do think i would have won the 'worlds most nonchalant walk' award as i strolled in to the kiosk to pay......

(* For those who don't know what i mean by an MJ Chamone:)
https://api.ning.com/files/X5K9klSJ8epWd34ML4sk1TyFzh9jaxqoy1Cw0766YA9xSwURzx3A9Vly6*MeXAA0Ui2nwjZOkyma7trpAOp*HXzKQYYT-gmn/chamone.jpg
____________________
Space Monkey #7
Don Eladio is dead. His capos are dead. You have no one left to fight for. Fill your pockets and leave in peace. Or fight me and die!
Mistergixer's videos on YouTube

[Acemastr]

kangaroo'ing off a busy as hell roundabout because my clutch hand has slipped off too early and i'd not got the revs anywhere near where they needed to be, alas i pulled off slower than a mobility scooter.... after filtering passed everyone
____________________
2017 KTM 350 XC-F - 2014 Yamaha R6 - 2005 Yamaha YZ125
2016 Toyota Tacoma Limited

[Barry_M2]

It's 1991, I've just brought a nice KR1-S from a dealer.

6pm and everyone is on their way home. Bike is sitting outside the showroom and I throw my leg over the Kwak and fire her up blipping the throttle a couple. What a sweet sound!!

Knock it into 1st and wait to pull out on to the main road when a bus stops and flashes to let me out.

I pull out of onto the main road into my lane, give it about 5% too much throttle and the brand new rear tyre decided it didn't want to grip any more, slid, and threw me off!

I'd travelled a grand total of 3 meters and owned the bike for approximatly 10 minutes and already stacked it, infront of a packed bus, on a busy main road with lots of passers by!

Prat!
____________________
ZXR750R (M2) - For the road.
CBR1000 RR4 - For the track.
https://www.bikechatforums.com/profile.php?mode=viewprofile&u=4332

[Hetzer]

[the grim reaper]

Aaah, the memories, where do I start?

Out jumping a mate over a hump backed bridge on an MTX125 (he was on an RXS100) only to find a 90 degree left hander straight after the bridge. He knew about it and made it round, I went - Brake - Lockup - sheeeiite - release - ditch - hedge - arse.

Pulled up ouside a shop to find that my loose shoelace had got wound into the front sprocket, tried to take my foot off the peg and couldn't - fell over.

Overtaking a ZX9R on my Blade and then stickig my knee on the deck in front of him to show off, unfortunately there was a nice patch of diesel on the roundabout, so I overtook him and then promptly fell off right in front of him.

There's probably loads more, including stacking my RG125F into the back of a Skoda but I'll leave that for another day.

Cheers

Grim
____________________
Adverts don't always work: Remember that advert, where the army are running across the desert and they have a wounded man on a stretcher. They get to a ravine, the bridge is down and a caption pops up that says, 'What are you thinking?'. I don't know about you but I was thinking, 'Christ, I'm glad I'm not in the f***ing army'.

[Whosthedaddy]

Most humiliating...








...picture the scene...







...tiny childs bike, main roads full of people and school kids and THE leathers that taste forgot...




https://p1.bikepics.com/pics/2007/10/21/bikepics-1062449-800.jpg

It is actually cringe worthy and I am starting to have PTSD nightmares about it.
____________________
Current : MSX 125 Past : CBR 900RR Monkeybike : c50 LAC : ZXR750 H2 : FZR600 : ZX7R P3 : YW100 : TRX850: Trophy 900 T309 : GSXR 600 L0: Monkeybike : XJ6S Whosthedaddy

[Whosthedaddy]

[mistergixer]

[Chriss]

I hate to bring it up again.

https://img152.imageshack.us/img152/3695/besttwocombinedjb5.jpg

Such painful, yet broken, memories.
____________________
TheShaggyDA: I've got 3 or 4 pairs that predate my wife, so at least 11.5 years old.

[tykey]

my 1 and only (thank god) big off was very humiliating but pain and worry were the main emotions at the time.

i've gone over the handlebars on a crosser that was borrowed to me, we were doing timed laps of a makeshift circuit , came flying round to the finish pulled the front brake and went straight over the handlebars doing a 360, the bike sorta did a 180.

best evAR which ive just remembered, it was on a pushbike but still funny.... i got challenged to a race down a very steep straight tarmac street, only about 50 metres in length but very very steep, at the bottom was a T junction, so i could go left, right or straight on into a 6 foot high wooden fence. off we go from the top, pedalling like fook won the race but forgot i had no brakes whatsover on this bike (really did just forget) i went straight through the fence had stitches in my ankle & hand never been so winded in my life. i was severely laughed at as i was setup by my mates

i won the feckin race tho

[Serendipity]

1997: New bike with even newer girlfriend on pillion. We stopped off at a mates house to meet up with friends and to my horror, parked outside, was the Porsche of my dastardly love rival. He had shown an unhealthy interest in my new woman and I was determined to prove myself the better man.

Went indoors to gather the troops then headed for the vehicles. The friends all piled into the Porsche while my lady and I get geared up and jump on the bike.

The car driver graciously waved for us to lead the way, so I pull out from the kerb with just the right amount of throttle to waft us up the…

…BANG!...

…we’re on the ground.

I can’t believe I just fvcking disk locked us! What a moron…. Shame and humiliation and the ridicule of laughing friends…

Still no harm done. The bike was unharmed. Not a scratch on us and the girl is now my wife. But at the time it was painfully embarrassing.
____________________
2007 CBF1000 & 2016 CBF1000F - Commuter heaven | 1994 CBR600FR - Awaiting defibrillation

[johnsmith222]

My embarassing moment was when I was in a shopping centre car park and I had bumped into two mates. We were hanging outside in the good weather and I had parked my CG in a bad place so I decided to remove it from the road.

Took it off the centrestand and began pushing it alongside it. For some reason I jumped onto the bike so I was sitting on it sideways rolling along. I normally ride it into my garage this way just out of laziness.

I lost balance and fell to the side that my back was facing. Countersteering just doesn't work if you're going at 2 mph with no power going to the backwheel.

The shameful thing is that this was months after I got my ZZR, and I must've dropped the CG a good 10 times in those months just because I'd lost all respect or care for it.

[Flip]

[Groove]

Wheelie past a row of traffic moving at about 20-30mph.

Must have hit about 50, put it down as coming up to a red light, have a brain wave and decide that a rolling stoppie is what is needed to make my cock grow an inch bigger.

Back end comes up, im rolling, how cool am i?!

Que me going over the handle bars and the bike crashing down, infront of all the people i just wheelied past.

Bloke who i was infront of kindly lifted the bike up with me.
____________________
|| Past: 1991 Kawasaki ZXR 250 ~ 2003 Honda CBR 600 F Sport ~ 2004 Kawasaki ZX6R B1H 636 ~ 1999 Yamaha R1 ~ 1999 Kawasaki ZX6R J ~ 2004 Kawasaki ZX6R B1H 636 ~ 1998 Honda VTR1000F Firestorm ~ K1 GSXR 600 Track bike ~ K6 GSXR 1000 ~ 2006 Speed Triple 1050 || Current: 2005 R1 https://www.adrucore.co.uk

[JP7]

While I was learning, the day before my test I did a U-turn and rode straight into a hedge... dropped the bike down a little slope and had to get help to get it out again!

[Hetzer]

[Whosthedaddy]

[Davo]

Probably for me the worst was on my first trackday.

So excited when they called our group out of the pits, managed to get straight to the front of the queue, lined up behind the instructer.

Sat on the bike, busy checking everything over in my mind (by that time there were 50 odd bikers behind me).

The instructor starts to move off on to the track, i'm given the go sign by the marshall.

Some how manage to cock my launch up, next thing I've know is I've dropped the bike on its side, with me still sitting on it with my leg trapped under it!

Then to top it off when I finished the day I loaded the bike up in the van, set off towards home. Whilst driving down the M25 coming up to Clacketts Lane I look in the passenger footwell to glimpse all the tie down straps sitting there. Pulled into the services ever so carefully just to have the bike fall over whilst I'm pulling into a parking space.

[Noxious89123]

Chamone, V-twin powa mutha fucka?
____________________
'06 Honda CBR125RW-6 ~ '00 Honda CBR600F-Y ~ '07 Honda CBR600RR-7 ~ Bikeless
'53 Ford Ka 1.3 ~ '03 Vauxhall Astra SRi 1.8 ~ '52 Vauxhall Astra SRi 2.2 ~ '53 Vauxhall Astra GSi

[stinkwheel]

Not me, but one of our local classic bike racers and motorcycle test examiner managed to highside his CB250 race bike at about 5mph the other weekend as he rode it across the green to collect a prize at the local vintage rally. Pretty much the whole town stood watching.

I suspect that incident will take some time to live down.
____________________
“Rule one: Always stick around for one more drink. That's when things happen. That's when you find out everything you want to know.”
I did the 2010 Round Britain Rally on my 350 Bullet. 89 landmarks, 3 months, 9,500 miles.

[Clanger]

On a very very cold, icy day in December circa 1997, I went out on my 125cc to visit a friend, pulled onto her drive, forgot to put my foot down and the bike tipped over (down hill) and trapped me underneath. I laid there for what seemed aaaages, waiting for someone to find me and help get the bike off me.

It was too slippery, too cold and the fact the bike was on top of me downhill, I just didn't have the strength to do anything but call out...
____________________
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter won't mind - Dr. Seuss

[LeeR]

1. First day back on the bike after breaking my foot in Dec 07 I filtered to the front of a queue of traffic waiting at a mini-roundabout.

Put my left foot down (the previously broken one) to find the camber was steeper than anticipated and the floor just wasn't there.

The drop was so far I found I couldn't hold the weight of me and the bike. So there I am lying under my bike and another biker alongside me offering to pick it up so I could get out from under it.

There were a lot of horns playing and it wasn't a concerto...

2. Recently I been noticing a few female riders out and about in the morning rush hour. Well one of them looks exceedingly attractive from behind in her leathers on what looks to be a black Suzuki 600.

One morning I'd followed her hypnotically for a few miles when we reach a major junction (the one where I had my accident).

I'm very cautious about filtering here now, and she was so cautious she didn't want to. So having my fill of being a lecherous old bastard I decided to filter to the front.

It was a bit tighter than I thought and had to jink the bike left and right to pass the transit van door mirrors at the head of the queue.

Lights change and you guessed it, I stalled.

The vans were reluctant to go past so waited for me to restart the bike and move off, by this time I was again accompanied by what sounded like a full brass section.
____________________
My claim to fame: Austin Vince nicked my pen...

[carlperkins00...]

picture this...
your riding through harleston village on the bike you just bought, its a shiny red cb600 hornet.
your wearing your new red 1 piece leathers and boots,
your glancing over at the shop windows to check out your reflection,
everythings good so far,
next to see a group of HOT 18-19 year olds looking at you
so you wave and move your head up and down as to show them your checking them out,
one even blows a kiss at you,
your feeling on top of the world!!!

then you glance forward and see the car infront has stopped so you slam on the brake as to not hit it, the adrenalin is still pumping so when the car moves off you hastliy try to move off and stall...

lastly you look over your shoulder to see the girls laughing and then walking away.

OUCH... my pride...

[ms51ves3]

[bazza]

Carry out a series of perfectly-executed overtakes as the lead rider on my Bikesafe course only to fail to notice the traffic lights at the T-junction ahead until the last moment and hastily perform a perfectly-executed rolling stoppie on the line.

Perfect, that is, apart from dropping the bike in front of the two police riders and other students...


____________________
"That's it. You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college."
'98 Ducati 750SS, '08 Suzuki GSX650F ©2004-2014, Bazza's Harmless Banter