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Immortal youth

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Old Git Racing
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PostPosted: 21:08 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Immortal youth Reply with quote

How do I convince a young relative that all the accidents he is having lately are not totally the fault of 'muppet car drivers'?
He's a nice lad, rides a 125, doesn't rag it all the time but trouble just seems to find him (or more likely he finds it).
He's done training etc but has this stubborn idea that everybody else is an idiot and he isn't.
How to get him to change his attitude, if he doesn't he's going to end up either a cabbage or dead. (I've told him this virtually word for word).
Ideas?

OGR
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P.addy
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PostPosted: 21:14 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

When I was on my 125, I was always the target of cars for their SMIDSYs.

I learnt by being put in a wheelchair. Get him to do some advanced riding with a decent school, bit of hazard perception and some SMIDSY weaving.
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Marmalade
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PostPosted: 21:15 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

I've been riding obscene mileages for many years and never had an off because of these blind cage drivers.
Does he think people like me have never had a smidsy?
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P.addy
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PostPosted: 21:17 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Marmalade wrote:
I've been riding obscene mileages for many years and never had an off because of these blind cage drivers.
Does he think people like me have never had a smidsy?


My brother in law has also had absolutely zero. I go for a ride with him and I get hit, literally out of nowhere. Some people are shit magnets.
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Itchy
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PostPosted: 21:19 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

In order to counter illusionary superiority and the inability of a person to spot their own failings. (Dunning–Kruger effect)

You need to provide earth shatteringly strong evidence backed arguments of why their illusionary superiority is illusionary.

I mean arguments where the proponent is heavily qualified, respected and well known and that the evidence is absolutely incontrovertible. Therefore any attempt to call foul on this perspective can't happen or is feeble at best.
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Omega
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PostPosted: 22:01 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Take him to a bikers funeral or hospital bed. Point out how that biker wasn't in the wrong either. Repeat until he gets the message.
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Mr Calendar



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PostPosted: 22:13 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Itchy wrote:
In order to counter illusionary superiority and the inability of a person to spot their own failings. (Dunning–Kruger effect)

You need to provide earth shatteringly strong evidence backed arguments of why their illusionary superiority is illusionary.

I mean arguments where the proponent is heavily qualified, respected and well known and that the evidence is absolutely incontrovertible. Therefore any attempt to call foul on this perspective can't happen or is feeble at best.

Can you tl;dr the psychobabble and give concrete, real world examples or descriptions?
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Rogerborg
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PostPosted: 22:22 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

I wouldn't bother trying to convince him that he's not totally awesome or that he's at fault.

Convince him that he needs to be more awesome.

Specifics. What is he doing "not" wrong? Assuming he's been seen? Putting himself where he can't be avoided?
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James83
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PostPosted: 22:44 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sounds like he has the same disease as a lot of kids these days - that some how the universe should magically be fair. I blame these 'there are no losers' school sports days.

Problem is, when you combine it with youth and inexperience, you get a rider who thinks hes good, but probably isn't and who won't accept it as his responsibility to keep himself alive when poor drivers try and kill him, because 'its not fair that I should have to change how I ride when they are the bad drivers'. Thinking your better than you are can only be cured with experience (well, maybe not cured, we all think we're Rossi sometimes Smile) but you might be able to get him to understand that actually, the universe is never ever going to say 'Oh, it wasn't your fault, un-potato' and so he has to decide between that or riding defensively.
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Mr Calendar



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PostPosted: 23:04 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just thought, use mind games. Ask if he would like to learn to ride faster.
Then get him to an iam bike session that will also cover defensive riding, because that's what they do. As well as riding a tad quicker to the next overtake.
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P.addy
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PostPosted: 23:08 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Fuck it, get someone to call and pretend to be from ambulance, say one of his extremely close family members has been involved in an accident.

Make him feel what they are likely to feel.
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Boxing
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PostPosted: 23:17 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Can't you go for a ride with him and see what he's actually like? And help him right his riding?
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bamt
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PostPosted: 23:19 - 14 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Rogerborg wrote:
I wouldn't bother trying to convince him that he's not totally awesome or that he's at fault.

Convince him that he needs to be more awesome.


Precisely. Everyone else on the road is a complete idiot and blind, so what do you need to do to survive around these morons?

Improved observation, positioning etc. The usual stuff, but presented as a way to show how much better he is than the average rider and to compensate for the morons, not that he's dangerous as-is.
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cloric_tzr
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PostPosted: 01:38 - 15 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

If he is finding himself in shizzenpoopen alot i would say he is maybe riding a little defensive? I.e riding closer to the curb rather than white line making it harder for turning cars to see him, straight lining roundabouts, traveling to fast in a 30 zone (my mum will openly admit she has difficulty judging how fast a bike is going, cars no probs but bike not so sure) luckily she just waits but some drivers arnt so honest even to themselves. Lights? Mines never off, and last but not least is he attempting to read a situation infront or just boldly thinking he knows whats happening? If that the case there may be no getting through to him.
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MCW
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PostPosted: 02:10 - 15 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Could you come at it from a different angle and ask him for advice? Not for you, that would be too forced, but perhaps for a young rider on the forum who won't listen because it's old gits like us doing the talking. You could ask him for 'help' explaining the stuff that you want him to think about and ways to put it in yoof friendly words. Teaching someone else can be the best way to learn.
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chickenstrip
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PostPosted: 08:59 - 15 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tell him he's right. All other road users ARE idiots. So now it's time for him to learn to treat them that way, i.e., that car WILL pull out, some idiot WILL come over that blind crest on the wrong side of the road etc etc, and to start riding accordingly.
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Hetzer
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PostPosted: 09:17 - 15 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Situational awareness, like many other human attributes, varies from person to person. It sounds like this chap's not got much of it and it can't really be taught (it's innate). Such people, for their own sake, shouldn't ride bikes on the highway.
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RhynoCZ
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PostPosted: 09:21 - 15 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

One shall find that out by him self soon enough, or die in a horrific accident. That's the thing with immortal youth. Thumbs Down
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Andy_Pagin
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PostPosted: 13:31 - 15 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

He'll either grow-up
or
Have a really bad smash and then grow up
or
Have a really bad smash, and the ghost of Darwin will finally put a tick in the box next to his name on his "Proves I was right" list.
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skatefreak
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PostPosted: 16:50 - 17 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm no Rossi, that's for sure but I've been commuting for 5-6 years with Zero incidents.

I know it sounds harsh and some people may be 'unlucky' but if you're getting hit on a bike, repeatedly....
you're clearly not being paranoid/safe enough.

I for one would be curious to hear about these incidents he's had.

If he was honest with you about the incidents he's had I am sure you could find a few trends.
I know I could be pretty stubborn, especially when I was younger but if someone laid out the reasons for a string of accidents and a recurring theme (ie my poor obs and not kamikaze cages) I would like to think I'd pay attention...

Either that or give him his two options:
- Work on his attitude and get more training .
- Work on his will.

-Jvr
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Copycat73
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PostPosted: 17:16 - 17 Jul 2014    Post subject: Re: Immortal youth Reply with quote

Old Git Racing wrote:

How to get him to change his attitude, if he doesn't he's going to end up either a cabbage or dead. (I've told him this virtually word for word).
Ideas?
OGR


change the messenger ....you are not worthy of his attention and don`t rate in his estimation...and constant naggin will just "boil his piss"
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yen_powell
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PostPosted: 18:17 - 17 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Buy him this t-shirt
https://www.andy-sparrow.co.uk/shop/product/107b/1.png
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Sload
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PostPosted: 18:41 - 17 Jul 2014    Post subject: Re: Immortal youth Reply with quote

Old Git Racing wrote:
How do I convince a young relative that all the accidents he is having lately are not totally the fault of 'muppet car drivers'?


You wont, he will either grow up, or not.

Few good suggestions here though, I like the if you are so awesome why are you always in the crap approach, cant be that good then, couldnt ride if his life depended on it etc.
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Codemonkey
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PostPosted: 08:04 - 18 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Strap a go-pro or similar to his bike and insist he video's his rides. After a while look through the footage and point out all the poor obs that could have resulted in him being wiped out / left a dribbling cabbage.
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Old Git Racing
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PostPosted: 15:39 - 18 Jul 2014    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks all, some good advice, I'll have another go with him.

OGR
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