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| staffo |
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 staffo Scooby Slapper

Joined: 26 Jun 2015 Karma :    
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 Posted: 14:41 - 06 Oct 2015 Post subject: Flys and balls |
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Story time.
Went running today with my dog. In fields. Giant (normal) sized fly goes straight down my throat. Start retching and am sick. Vomit so hard something happens to balls. Feels like someone has punched my gooch and its twisted. Drop to my knees, into sick. Covered in sick. Cannot stand up. Pain. Dog tries to lick sick off me. Prise phone out of pocket and Google twisted bollock symptoms. Fear i will have to call an ambulance.
5 minutes pass and the pain lessens. Managed to get up and slow walk then jog home.
Is this normal? Do I have testicular aids cancer? ____________________ Daytona 675R Road - 5EB R6 Track sold
15:58:19 Ste: your spelling it worse than a retards.
15:58:23 Ste: *is |
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| nowhere.elysium |
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 nowhere.elysium The Pork Lord

Joined: 02 Mar 2009 Karma :    
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| Minty |
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 Minty World Chat Champion

Joined: 23 Dec 2005 Karma :   
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| pepperami |
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 pepperami Super Spammer

Joined: 17 Jan 2010 Karma :    
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| c_dug |
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 c_dug Super Spammer

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| MCN |
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 MCN Super Spammer

Joined: 22 Jul 2015 Karma :   
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 Posted: 16:02 - 06 Oct 2015 Post subject: |
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Endometriosis.
You can get tablets to help.
Or just a spasm and you pulled a ligament in your crotchet.
Maybe MTFU a wee bit it was only a big fly .
 ____________________ Disclaimer: The comments above may be predicted text and not necessarily the opinion of MCN. |
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| staffo |
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 staffo Scooby Slapper

Joined: 26 Jun 2015 Karma :    
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 Posted: 16:17 - 06 Oct 2015 Post subject: |
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Haha, can feel it sometimes when I sneeze, like a little tug. But this was that on steroids. Was in some decent pain for a good 5 mins, hense why I suspected I had twisted one.
Fun times ____________________ Daytona 675R Road - 5EB R6 Track sold
15:58:19 Ste: your spelling it worse than a retards.
15:58:23 Ste: *is |
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| weasley |
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 weasley World Chat Champion

Joined: 16 Oct 2010 Karma :    
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| MCN |
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 MCN Super Spammer

Joined: 22 Jul 2015 Karma :   
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| staffo |
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 staffo Scooby Slapper

Joined: 26 Jun 2015 Karma :    
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 Posted: 16:32 - 06 Oct 2015 Post subject: |
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I'll await a sock offering me a tounge massage then. ____________________ Daytona 675R Road - 5EB R6 Track sold
15:58:19 Ste: your spelling it worse than a retards.
15:58:23 Ste: *is |
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| staffo |
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 staffo Scooby Slapper

Joined: 26 Jun 2015 Karma :    
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| MCN |
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 MCN Super Spammer

Joined: 22 Jul 2015 Karma :   
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| weasley |
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 weasley World Chat Champion

Joined: 16 Oct 2010 Karma :    
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| MCN |
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 MCN Super Spammer

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| smegballs |
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 smegballs World Chat Champion
Joined: 28 Oct 2007 Karma :  
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| Fisty |
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 Fisty Super Spammer

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| Tracey Suntan-King |
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 Tracey Suntan-King World Chat Champion

Joined: 10 Nov 2012 Karma :   
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 Posted: 20:58 - 07 Oct 2015 Post subject: |
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Seriously though, maybe the fly laid some eggs before you sicked it up and they were taking root in your scrotum. Once the eggs had attached, the pain stopped.
In about a week you'll have maggots coming out of your willie.
If they don't come out that means you'll have flies (inside your flies ) and your balls will vibrate every time you pass a cowpat. ____________________ Whether you think you can, or think you can't, you're probably right |
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| Polarbear |
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 Polarbear Super Spammer

Joined: 24 Feb 2007 Karma :  
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 Posted: 00:49 - 08 Oct 2015 Post subject: |
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| Tracey Suntan-King wrote: | Seriously though, maybe the fly laid some eggs before you sicked it up and they were taking root in your scrotum. Once the eggs had attached, the pain stopped.
In about a week you'll have maggots coming out of your willie.
If they don't come out that means you'll have flies (inside your flies  ) and your balls will vibrate every time you pass a cowpat. |
Don't tell his missus, she'll want a lump of cow shit near to help his 'performance'. The man with the built in vibrator  ____________________ Triumph Trophy Launch Edition |
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| mudcow007 |
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 mudcow007 World Chat Champion

Joined: 01 Feb 2012 Karma :   
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 Posted: 10:02 - 09 Oct 2015 Post subject: |
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| staffo |
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 staffo Scooby Slapper

Joined: 26 Jun 2015 Karma :    
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 Posted: 10:47 - 09 Oct 2015 Post subject: |
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I reckon it was a horse fly if that helps with the maggot theories ____________________ Daytona 675R Road - 5EB R6 Track sold
15:58:19 Ste: your spelling it worse than a retards.
15:58:23 Ste: *is |
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| Rogue_Shadow |
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 Rogue_Shadow World Chat Champion
Joined: 10 May 2012 Karma :   
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 Posted: 13:01 - 09 Oct 2015 Post subject: |
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You'll even be fine ... or you wont
If only there was a free establishment that you could visit to get advice from trained medical professions.
If only
One day
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| staffo |
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 staffo Scooby Slapper

Joined: 26 Jun 2015 Karma :    
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| The999Kid |
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 The999Kid World Chat Champion

Joined: 11 Jan 2008 Karma :  
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Old Thread Alert!
The last post was made 10 years, 275 days ago. Instead of replying here, would creating a new thread be more useful? |
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